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The Almost X-Rated Garage Sale (Part 2)

Tweetby Jenny Hansen In the last two weeks, the Hubs and I have engaged in the energy-sapping double-whammy of “garage sale” and “kid party” over back-to-back weekends. The kid party, complete with margaritas and a bounce [...]

Making Your TSA Grope Memorable and Fun

TweetBy Piper Bayard & Jay Holmes Spring break is kicking off the travel season, and summer is just around the corner. The DHS and the TSA are already using this timing to further justify molesting American citizens and irradiating them [...]

ComfyBalls: A Classic Case of Undie Discrimination

Tweetby Jenny Hansen The U.S. Patent and Trade Offices banned a Norwegian brand of undies, called (wait for it) “ComfyBalls.” As far as I can tell, they’re traditional boxers with “just a little bit more” here [...]

Bayard & Holmes Personal History Improvement Service

TweetBy Jay Holmes The hot media story has been the NBC anchor Brian Williams debacle. In an apparent attempt to burnish his personal image, Brian claimed to have been in a helicopter that was hit by an Iraqi RPG, when in fact he had been in [...]

DeflateGate or Deflated-Ego-Gate,what do you think?

Tweet   Link to audio: https://soundcloud.com/willrobertsweeklyradio/12315dailyscreamdeflategate     I’m Will Roberts, and this is the daily scream!! Ahh, here we go! Now how sad is it that we question everything [...]

Frozen Bitch Face — What You Need To Know

TweetBy Piper Bayard Everyone’s face freezes at forty-five. Seriously. At forty-five, give or take a year or two, Frosty the Face Freezer breathes on us at an unpredictable instant, and the expression we are wearing on our face at that [...]

The State of the Union or state of confusion?

Tweet I’m Will Roberts, and this is the daily scream!! Ahh, here we go! Well, it looks like the plan for our country for the next two years is set in stone, … yea right. As a humorist I am obligated to throw humor in my little [...]

Reporting Potential Terrorist Toddlers–UK Ueber Alles!

TweetBy Piper Bayard & Jay Holmes Every now and then, we here at Bayard & Holmes are reassured that not all of the political crack heads in the democratic world reside in the US Congress or the White House. As part of its counter-terrorism [...]

The Power of Indulgence

TweetBy Piper Bayard Nicotine patches are flying off the shelves and personal trainers are working overtime as every gym across the nation fills with the January Resolutioners. image from US Air Force, wikimedia commons The Resolutioners are [...]

Obnoxious Relatives? Call the Spanking Santa!

TweetBy Piper Bayard & Jay Holmes The most wonderful stressful time of the year is upon us. Long lines, visiting relatives, and credit card bills that give bankers a warm, fuzzy feeling in their wallets. But fear not! Bayard [...]